Flying

[Colleen]

For those of you who fly alot, or just have flown.. what advice can you give someone who has really bad anxiety about flying and is kinda paranoid about it? What can be done to ease the stress and made the flight not so bad??

[Terry]

Oh, how I feel for you! Assuming it's you that you're talking about :-)

I, too used to have an intense fear of flying. So much so that my knuckles would literally turn white and I would shake the entire flight. I had flown in the past with no problem, and the anxiety seemed to develop suddenly after one very turbulent flight.

I got over it by literally "facing my fear" and just doing it. It sounds cliche, but that's what I did; I took on a job that required travel by plane and I think subconsciously that's why I took it. The first time I flew for my job, I listened to soothing music on my ipod and made sure I had an interesting book to read to keep me occupied. So between the ipod and my book, I wasn't distracted by the sounds of the plane. I had my son (he's a grown man with no fear of flying, LOL!) with me on that flight (we work for the same company) and it was only about a 45 minute flight so it was good to start with that baby step.

Each subsequent flight just got easier after that. Now I have absolutely no fear of flying and in fact somewhat look forward to it mostly because that was a big thing for me to face and I'm proud of the accomplishment. It's still not in my top list of favorite things to do, but it certainly doesn't bother me anymore.

My advice to ease the stress and anxiety about it is to start taking some Kava Kava herbal supplement regularly for about a week before the flight (helps you deal with stress and anxiety) and to load up an ipod with whatever music soothes your soul and take a good book.

I hope that helps. It worked for me :-)

XOXO

[Bex]

im not affraid of flying, but i often think about how magical it is, the way this big thing is able to come off the ground! i love looking out the window because its just wow. They have films of international flights, so that does tend to keep your mind busy! x

[RSAgirl]

I fly a number of times a year, usually two of those trips are International since I am from South Africa. I just flew to SA in December. Just the flight from DC to Johannesburg alone was 18 hours non stop. I love flying, because without it I wouldn't get to see my family as often, because I would probably have to travel by ship. That been said it wasn't always easy, but I have learned to love it. I focused on the positives and refused to think about the "what ifs". Once we took off I would not think about the obvious, that is, we were 1000's of feet above the ground. I would relax, listen to music, watch a movie/s or read a particularly think and intense book which would keep my mind focused. I also remind myself that we are actually safer up in the air than on the ground.
There are supplements that can help such as; Kava,passionflower, Valerian or Rescue remedy.
Hopefully it will be okay.

[Kimberly]

I fly every year back home to see my family. I have bad anxiety about it and am afraid of heights and bridges. But when I fly these are some of the tricks I use. What I do is not think about it. I keep my mind on other things and don't focus on flying. Sometime when I start thinking too much about it I will picture a brick wall in my mind and while picturing this wall I will go about the things I'm doing. The best thing to do is not think about it a lot, the actual plane ride. When I get on the plane I do sit by the window because I feel it's worse when you in an isle seat also when you are in the air if you look out the window most times you will only see clouds and they look close which seems to help m. I also sit in the middle of the plane just in front of the wing, if I can because you feel the take off and landing and all the movements of the plane a lot less. I flew first class one time and you could feel everything plus it seemed we were going up a little too long for my liking. I also take a magazine and a book with me to get my mind off it. If you have a lay over you will find that they serve the drinks and snacks then they come around to serve them again, then they come and collect the trash. by then it's almost time to land. I'm usually in the air two to two and half hours at a time. If you notice you usually aren't in the air the total time they give you. These are some of the coping skills I use. Good luck, don't worry too much and enjoy your flight. Never let your fear stop you. My whole family suffers from panic attacks and my mother suffers from phobia's she can't drive very far. I haven't let it stop me. I know if I do that it will start with this one fear and go on to another and soon I won't be doing anything I enjoy.



Kimberly Walker

[Colleen]

Thank you guys for your advice. Im going to get some herbs today to help with the anxiety. My main fear is just the plane crashing and I dying a horrible death. >.< yeah.. I hate it lol.

[Helen]

I used to have a fear of flying - I think most people do, but basically I just confronted it by owning the fear and deciding that it wasn't bigger than me. I started to sit near the windows on flights and make myself look out on take off/landing which were particular fear points and during the flight. Bit by bit I started to feel a little more comfortable with it. What helped was that we went and lived in France for a bit and because of the logistics of cat minding would fly home seperately to see family and friends so for a period of about 2 years I was a fairly frequent flyer on my own. On one such flight I was looking out of the window and though 'wouldn't it be lovely to do a parachute jump and just float through the sky' .....yeh I know....... and I hadn't even been drinking. Some years later I did do a tandem skydive and whilst I didn't really enjoy it all that much it has completely cured my fear of flying and heights. Have since been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris and looked over the edge and it didn't bother me at all. Just thought wow what a great view.

So, Colleen - my advice would be (and I know this is easier said than done) but, just feel the fear, let it wash over you. What's the worst thing that could happen?? If it crashes it crashes, anyone of us could be killed by something at any moment. The thing is not to let the thought of it overwhelm you because I have a feeling that the thought is far worse than the likelihood of it actually happening.

Hope that helps.

[Winona]

Good answer, Helen. I realize that death is inevitable, and at some point a terrible accident or disease will claim your life. It's most certainly going to happen. If it happens on a plane, at least it's quick and over with.

You need to intellectually understand statistics. You're WAY more likely to be killed in a car crash.

[Terry]

One other thing. My son (sometimes seemingly wiser than me, LOL!) said to me on one flight, "You just have to trust that the pilot knows what he's doing." Oh, man. That one statement is in my mind EVERY time I fly :-)

[Clarissa Kelly]

Hi,

I'm the same as Trinity, I developed my fear after one very bumpy flight, too. I have really had to learn to deal with this, as my husband's family lives in the UK (I'm in USA). I used to be a flight attendant, too! It can happen to ANYONE.

I would recommend taking short flights to start, as Trinity said. Don't fly where there would be turbulence (going over mountains for instance, can cause lots of that). My last flight I had Hypnosis MP3's and I also brought beads and made a bracelet! It really helps to focus on something like that. Bring a crossword puzzle or Sudoku book! AND, have you heard of "EFT?" If not, look for it on YouTube and you'll see what it is all about. It is a technique that can cure phobias, and I use it when I fly or any time I feel anxiety.

Kimberly is right about where you sit, too. I feel better when I can see out, even thought that sounds like it wouldn't.

And YES, trust the pilots! They really do know what they are doing. They are a lot safer than most of the drivers on the roads--think about that!!!

There is also a great website, http://www.fearofflyinghelp.com/

Best wishes to you,
Clarissa

[Melody]

Probably very un PC to say here on RawFu.. but... if ft is really bad..

Xanax! Just a small amount to get you through the flights. (only take for the flights though because it's VERY addictive)

[Jane]

I don't have a terrible fear but too much turbulance makes me very tense. My coping strategy is just to focus on my breathing and think about all of the planes in the air that are doing just fine. There are dozens of planes ahead of you and behind you, and thousands in the air over the US at any given time. When I put it in perspective for myself about how many uneventful flights there are I feel better about it. The meditation breathing is really the key for me. It's very calming and lets me think more logically when I am stressed.

Jane

[Colleen]

I have thought about it.. but I don't like pills. :(

Melody said:

Probably very un PC to say here on RawFu.. but... if ft is really bad..

Xanax! Just a small amount to get you through the flights. (only take for the flights though because it's VERY addictive)